We're potty training. Well, we've been half-assedly potty training for the past year but now we're getting serious. She started the day naked. To my surprise, she actually sat on her potty-chair herself a few times. Eventually she decided she wanted to use the big potty in the bathroom, which was rewarded with lots of over-the-top praise and attention. The closer we got to naptime, the more insistent she was that she be in a diaper, though. That was unfortunate, but I'd rather the diaper than pee on my carpet I suppose.

Hubbs is working 2 jobs, currently. They're both 30+ hours every week, often 35+. I'm working VERY part-time now, about 10 hours per week. It's pretty hectic & very lonely. I really miss seeing him. But with this arrangement, we don't have Layla in daycare. We strongly believe that the best people to raise Layla are us, so keeping her out of daycare is a priority for us. Besides that, it's a little silly for me to work full-time also & have her in daycare when my paychecks would just barely cover the childcare bill. Even with him working all the time, we're still stretched so thin financially. It's absurd. But it's taught us a lot. And it's made me thankful for things I never imagined I would be.

Growing up, my dad was pretty awful. I mean, I've heard way worse stories than my family's but most people that hear mine are shocked. One of the more unusual punishments I had - as did at least 1 of my brothers - was being exiled to the yard one winter. It was snowy, sometime between mid-November & January, in pretty rural central Pennsylvania.  I was allowed a tent, 1 military-style wool blanket, and 1 coat. My punishment was 3 days & 3 nights. I think my brother had a longer term, but I'm pretty sure his was summertime also. We were also made to wash our clothes in the creek during that time. Now, it's a creek & we weren't allowed detergent, so it really only made things worse to try & wash them. But it did teach me the basic idea. And as an adult, in the 5 years I've lived away from home, I've been hand-washing all my laundry for probably more months than I have used a machine. Lately it's been by hand. I've pretty much perfected my technique now. And since I'm using soap, and not a creek, it actually works! One day I was reassessing our monthly budget & resigned myself to exclusively hand-washing & line-drying our laundry. We spent approx. $20 every week at the laundromat at our apartments; that's $80 a month on washing clothes! That's $80 we're not spending anymore.

Realizing that we could be way more frugal if we could be way more self-reliant led me to a lot of DIY-ing and penny-pinching techniques. Cloth diapers was a big one, but since we couldn't afford the GOOD brands we won't be able to reuse Layla's dipes for the next baby. But in the end, we saved a lot of money from just that. Let's do some math: We spend $50 every month on diapers for Layla, and that's been the same since the beginning. We cloth diapered exclusively for 18 months. That's $900. But we spent $100 total on her 30 dipes, so really we only saved $800. ONLY. 

I still give myself small luxuries, though. I use the dishwasher... I hate washing dishes. But I make my own soap for it. That's another $10/mo off our grocery bill. I still allow small splurges on ourselves, too... except now we shop at the dollar store instead of the mall. And once a year, I buy a lotto ticket. Just to keep the hope.

Even when things are rough & look really bleak, you have to keep that hope. It's the only thing you have sometimes. That and the love you've invested.